C.S. Lewis wrote a book called "The 4 Loves." I saw all 4 this morning at a bagel and bread place called Panera. I observed Affection, Friendship, Eros and Charity within 30 minutes. First, I noticed a young couple in a booth, holding hands while eating. Never mind the fine motor skills it takes to accomplish this, but they appeared "in love."
Across from the "love birds" was a group of men discussing the bible and the BCS college football standings. Next to them, was a middle age man and his young daughter. The little girl was wiggling in her chair, singing a song about butterflies. The man smiled, hummed a few bars and quietly told the little one to be still and finish her food.
In all three conversations, love was being expressed. Love can be communicated many ways and is essential to cultivating a meaningful relationship where intimacy, care and regard for the other person are nurtured. C.S. Lewis describes the 4 Loves as:
Affection or Storge is a fondness through familiarity, a natural love without coercion.
Friendship or Phileo is a strong bond existing between people who share a common interest or activity.
Eros is the sense of being 'in love' which is distinct from sexuality which Lewis calls Venus. Eros can have a sexual expression but it does not define this love.
Charity or Agape is the unconditional care for a person regardless of circumstance. Lewis recognizes charity as the greatest of loves. He sees it as a Christian virtue. This love is expressed in God's unconditional love for us.
In the relationships we form, one or more of these "loves" is displayed. As I observed the "love fest" going on this morning, it gave me a sense of hope, in spite of all the anger and hate out there-love rules-let me count the ways.
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